My 'real' dad has never been a part of my life. Why I call him my 'real' dad still baffles me. He's never been there for me, and he's shut the door in my face more times that I care to remember. Our birthdays are one day apart, with his being first. I usually call him on his birthday so I can gloat the next day about him forgetting mine. This year I got busy and forgot. I did receive a phone call from him a few days later. He wanted to know if I wanted some old recliners he wanted to get rid of. Why on Earth..... as if I need old junk?
A few months ago I found the myspace page of the one daughter he claims (yes, there are more of 'us' out there that he doesn't). I read it faithfully, often. It doesn't mention me. I'm no more a part of her life than she is of mine. In a way, it hurts.
If I could go back, I would take back ever meeting him, which I did finally at 18. At least then I could still have the fantasy that he was great and perfect and out saving the world. It's better than the truth: he's a selfish old man who smokes and still doesn't want me. I wish I could sever the ties for good, but I just don't have it in me.
Tuesday, October 24, 2006
Family Ties
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4 comments:
Hugs, Christi. You don't need a guy like that in your life, you're right. You deserve much much better.
*HUGS*HUGS*HUGS* Your post could have been mine. I met mine at 18 too and wished I hadnt.
Big hugs. It's his loss, not yours.
Huge hugs! He obviously doesn't know what he gave up, and from the way it sounds, you were better off with out him.
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