Tuesday, March 27, 2007

Another Walk on the Wild Side

I usually don't fill these out because of a paranoia that someone will use an answer to guess a password online. Not a valid paranoia, mind you, because I always lie when I answer the 'secret question' -- lie to the point that even I can't guess the answer. When I forget a password -- that's right, I'm screwed.

What curse word do you use the most? The S-word, I think
Do you own an ipod? A $79 Shuffle, does that count?
What person on your f-list do you talk to the most? F-list? Married people defiantly do not get an f-list!
What time is your alarm clock set to? 6:01 am - which is actually 5:41 am. No, it no longer fools me. I hit snooze twice -- usually.
Do you still remember the first person you kissed? Yes, he is now living with a man.
Do you remember where you were on September 11th, 2001? I was getting ready for my very first appointment with the shrink who told me to leave my first husband. I thought the radio station was doing another 'stunt'.
Would you rather take the picture or be in the picture? Take it
What was the last movie you watched? Blood Diamond
Do any of your friends have children? Yes
Has anyone ever called you lazy? Yes, and I am.
Do you ever take medication to help you fall asleep? No, my head only has to hit the pillow, and sometimes not even that.
What CD is currently in your CD player? Lots of random CDs that my friend makes with music she steals from the Internet. They never have the same genre of music for two songs in a row.
Do you prefer regular or chocolate milk? regular
Has anyone told you a secret this week? No, I'm not so good with the secrets.
When was the last time you had Starbucks? Yuck, never.
Can you whistle? Not well
What is the first thing you notice about the opposite sex? Depends.
What are you looking forward to? Horse Show season
Did you watch cartoons as a child? The few we had with only the local broadcast channels.
Do you own any band t-shirts? no
What will you be doing in one hour? putting kids to bed
Is anyone in love with you? highly doubtful
What was the last song you heard? I have no idea
Last time you cried? yesterday
Desktop computer or a laptop? either or both
Are you currently wanting any piercings or tattoos? No
What's the weather like? Wet, but warm
Would you ever date a girl/guy covered in tattoos? No
What did you do before this? wrote another post
When is the last time you slept on the floor? a couple of nights ago
How many hours of sleep do you need to function? 3, but I'm a bitch with less than 8
Do you eat breakfast daily? yes
Are your days fast-paced? you have no idea
What did you do last night? My parents' taxes
Do you use sarcasm? Never!
How old will you be turning on your next birthday? 21 - again
Are you picky about spelling and grammar? spoken, yes, but I'm not such a good speller. Most people I know blubber that they 'ain't never got none' -- drives me nuts!
Have you ever been to Six Flags? No
Do you get along better with the same sex or the opposite sex? It's a toss-up. I'm too bossy to get along with most
Do you like mustard? Yuck
Do you sleep on your side? Yes
Do you watch the news? Not usually, too depressing
How did you get one of your scars? I fell off my teeter-totter when I was standing on it and ended up with 5 stitches in my butt, there is still a scar
Who was the last person to make you mad? LOL, seriously?

I've never seen The Godfather Either

I stole this from Karen, who stole this from Traci, who stole it from Michele, who stole it from....

According to the supposed "rules," if you've seen over 85 of these movies, then you have no life.

My count was 58, if I can count right. I've seen bits and pieces of a lot more, but maybe only 5 minutes worth -- long enough to fall asleep. What is really embarrassing is that we own most of those movies. The husband is a huge DVD 'collector' so we must.own.everything. I bet we have 500 movies. I tried doing the math for him one day, but all reason went out the window. His eyes glazed over and I lost him. I pledged long ago to never watch anything made before 1979. A pledge I broke to watch Deliverance, which quite possibly be one of the worse movies ever made.

( ) Rocky Horror Picture Show
(X) Grease
(X) Pirates of the Caribbean
(X) Pirates of the Caribbean 2: Dead Man’s Chest
( ) Boondock Saints
(X ) Fight Club
( ) Starsky and Hutch
(X) Neverending Story
( ) Blazing Saddles
( ) Airplane
( ) The Princess Bride
( ) AnchorMan
( ) Napoleon Dynamite
( ) Labyrinth
( ) Saw
( ) Saw II
( ) White Noise
( ) White Oleander
( ) Anger Management
(X) 50 First Dates
( ) The Princess Diaries
( ) The Princess Diaries 2: Royal Engagement
(X) Scream
(X) Scream 2
(X) Scream 3
( ) Scary Movie
( ) Scary Movie 2
( ) Scary Movie 3
( ) Scary Movie 4
(X) American Pie
(X) American Pie 2
(X) American Wedding
( ) American Pie Band Camp
( ) Harry Potter 1
( ) Harry Potter 2
( ) Harry Potter 3
( ) Harry Potter 4
( ) Resident Evil 1
( ) Resident Evil 2
(X) The Wedding Singer
( ) Little Black Book
( ) The Village
( ) Lilo & Stitch
(X) Finding Nemo
( ) Finding Neverland
( ) Signs
( ) The Grinch
( ) Texas Chainsaw Massacre
( ) Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Beginning
( ) White Chicks
(X) Butterfly Effect
( ) 13 Going on 30
( ) I, Robot
(X) Robots
( ) Dodgeball: A True Underdog Story
( ) Universal Soldier
( ) Lemony Snicket: A Series Of Unfortunate Events
( ) Along Came Polly
( ) Deep Impact
(X) KingPin
(X) Never Been Kissed
(X) Meet The Parents
(X) Meet the Fockers
( ) Eight Crazy Nights
( ) Joe Dirt
( ) King Kong
( ) A Cinderella Story
(X) The Terminal
( ) The Lizzie McGuire Movie
( ) Passport to Paris
(X) Dumb & Dumber
( ) Dumber & Dumberer
(X) Final Destination
(X) Final Destination 2
( ) Final Destination 3
( ) Halloween
(X) The Ring
( ) The Ring 2
( ) Surviving Christmas
( ) Flubber
( ) Harold & Kumar Go To White Castle
( ) Practical Magic
( ) Chicago
(X) Ghost Ship
( ) From Hell
( ) Hellboy
(X) Secret Window
( ) I Am Sam
( ) The Whole Nine Yards
( ) The Whole Ten Yards
( ) The Day After Tomorrow
( ) Child’s Play
( ) Seed of Chucky
( ) Bride of Chucky
(X) Ten Things I Hate About You
(X) Just Married
( ) Gothika
(X) Nightmare on Elm Street
(X) Sixteen Candles
(X) Remember the Titans
( ) Coach Carter
( ) The Grudge
( ) The Grudge 2
(X) The Mask
( ) Son Of The Mask
( ) Bad Boys
(X) Bad Boys 2
( ) Joy Ride
( ) Lucky Number Sleven
( ) Ocean’s Eleven
( ) Ocean’s Twelve
(X) Bourne Identity
( ) Bourne Supremecy( ) Lone Star
( ) Bedazzled
( ) Predator I
( ) Predator II
( ) The Fog
(X) Ice Age
(X) Ice Age 2: The Meltdown
( ) Curious George
( ) Independence Day
( ) Cujo
( ) A Bronx Tale
( ) Darkness Falls
( ) Christine
(X) E.T.
( ) Children of the Corn
( ) My Bosses Daughter
(X) Maid in Manhattan
( ) War of the Worlds
( ) Rush Hour
( ) Rush Hour 2
( ) Best Bet
(X) How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days
( ) She’s All That
( ) Calendar Girls
( ) Sideways
( ) Mars Attacks
( ) Event Horizon
( ) Ever After
(X) Wizard of Oz
(X) Forrest Gump
( ) Big Trouble in Little China
( ) The Terminator
( ) The Terminator 2
( ) The Terminator 3
( ) X-Men
( ) X-2
( ) X3
(X) Spider-Man
( ) Spider-Man 2
( ) Sky High
( ) Jeepers Creepers
( ) Jeepers Creepers 2
(X) Catch Me If You Can
(X) The Little Mermaid
( ) Freaky Friday
( ) Reign of Fire
(X) The Skulls
(X) Cruel Intentions
( ) Cruel Intentions 2
( ) The Hot Chick
( ) Shrek
( ) Shrek 2
( ) Swimfan
( ) Miracle on 34th street
( ) Old School
( ) The Notebook
( ) K-Pax
( ) Krippendorf’s Tribe
( ) A Walk to Remember
( ) Ice Castles
( ) Boogeyman
(X) The 40-year-old Virgin
(X) Lord of the Rings: Fellowship of the Ring
( ) Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers
(X) Lord of the Rings: Return Of the King
( ) Indiana Jones and the Raiders of the Lost Ark
( ) Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom
( ) Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade
( ) Base-ketball
(X) Hostel
( ) Waiting for Guffman
( ) House of 1000 Corpses
( ) Devils Rejects
(X) Elf
( ) Highlander
( ) Mothman Prophecies
( ) American History X
( ) Three
( ) The Jacket
( ) Kung Fu Hustle
( ) Shaolin Soccer
( ) Night Watch
(X) Monsters Inc.
(X) Titanic
( ) Monty Python and the Holy Grail
( ) Shaun Of the Dead
( ) Willard
( ) High Tension
( ) Club Dread
( ) Hulk
( ) Dawn Of the Dead
( ) Hook
( ) Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe
(X) 28 days later
( ) Orgazmo
( ) Phantasm
( ) Waterworld
( ) Kill Bill Vol. 1
( ) Kill Bill Vol. 2
( ) Mortal Kombat
( ) Wolf Creek
( ) Kingdom of Heaven
( ) the Hills Have Eyes
( ) I Spit on Your Grave
( ) The Last House on the Left
( ) Re-Animator
( ) Army of Darkness
( ) Star Wars Ep. I The Phantom Menace
( ) Star Wars Ep. II Attack of the Clones
( ) Star Wars Ep. III Revenge of the Sith
( ) Star Wars Ep. IV A New Hope
( ) Star Wars Ep. V The Empire Strikes Back
( ) Star Wars Ep. VI Return of the Jedi
( ) Ewoks: Caravan Of Courage
( ) Ewoks: The Battle For Endor
(X) The Matrix
(X) The Matrix: Reloaded
( ) The Matrix: Revolutions
( ) Animatrix
( ) Evil Dead
( ) Evil Dead 2
( ) Team America: World Police
( ) Red Dragon
(X) Silence of the Lambs
( ) Hannibal

Dollar Days

I saw a commercial today advertising that the Dollar General was having a clearance with up to 75% off. The Dollar General is a store that, like the Dollar Tree and countless others, offers generic merchandise for $1.

What kind of clearance could they possibly need? I say donate it to Goodwill and be done with it.

Tuesday, March 20, 2007


Well, after the backlash following the great dog saga, the dog is home and no longer lives at the barn. However, she still lives outside. She's loving it, the kids are loving it, and everyone seems happy.

I'm exhausted.

Friday, March 16, 2007

NuWave Media is for Suckers

I stumbled upon this gem tonight: http://www.nuwavemedia.com/02pages/software.htm

So, for the bargain price of $30, they will submit your site to 400 search engines (396 of which no one ever uses) and 25 directories -- TWICE! Well then! Why twice? Do people really still do mass submits? Or you can opt for the 9000 search engines. That is Nine THOUSAND, folks. Hold me back. Ignore that they use the same title tag on every page. And no style sheet.

If that isn't enough, how about some doorway pages? Clearly against Google's quality guidelines, but that part is left out. So, for the grand price of $59.95 you can get submission to 9000 search engines and 150 junky directories -- AND -- get banned from the search engine that owns about 70% of the market.

Sounds like a deal.

Why I Grind my Teeth

My dog is a barn dog. She's lived at the barn since I've gotten her. The barn is at my Grandma's house. I bought her a nice $350 pen to live in to keep her safe.

In November my aunt's dog came to live with her. They are sisters. My aunt's dog moved into my $350 pen and my $100 dog house. Rent free. She has provided dog food for them for approximately 7 nights of the almost 4 months her dog has been there. I have provided the rest. I also provide the labor it takes to feed them.

Today her daughter (who is an adult) decided to let them out unsupervised. They dog pound caught them. I now have about $200 in fees to pay. She said that was the price of owning a dog. Apparently she missed the chapter about providing room & board. And the responsibility it takes to have them.

Sometimes I seriously hate my family.

Wednesday, March 14, 2007

On Becoming a Man

A few weeks ago, Shawn, the 9 year old, played dodgeball at the YMCA. On the way home I asked if he had fun. He said it was great until he got hit with a ball between the legs and then he cried.

I said, "So you got hit where it counts?"

After a moment of thought he replies, "No, they said it didn't count, but it sure did hurt!"

Yea, I imagine.

Tuesday, March 13, 2007

Hey Cherie!

Happy Birthday tomorrow! I hope it's a good one!

Monday, March 12, 2007

Educational Experience

We finally got a new home phone 'system'. It came with a new answering machine and, most importantly, two cordless phones whose batteries last longer than 5 minutes. The man of the house, a computer tech for several years, was in charge of getting it going.

I checked the messages tonight. Imagine my surprise to find our answering machine talking in Spanish! Imagine the surprise of those who left messages! I figured I'd be able to get it into English by pressing buttons. The only Spanish I know is my numbers (to 10) and anything Dora's managed to get into my head (like swimming pool and whatever 'vamonos' means). I erased the messages without a problem -- luckily it wasn't made by Google and it didn't try to translate those. However the menu kept saying siete.. -- so I kept pressing 7. I finally gave up and consulted the manual. Coincidentally, the manual that stated the default language would be English. I eventually got the stupid thing to talk to me in the language that is spoken in this country. The siete? Well, it was saying 'press 7 to repeat the menu'. DUH!

I now know how to say 'You have zero messages' in Spanish. It least I think that is what it was saying. It could have been calling me a dumb monkey for all I know; I took German in school.

Monday, March 05, 2007

Happy Birthday 3 Year Old!

Happy Birthday, Megan! The first three years of your life has been a wild ride for us all! Keep the world on it's toes, honey, you deserve nothing less than the best!

Love you,


Thursday, March 01, 2007

Conspiracy Theorist

Today one of my Google Ads was for Jenny Craig. Think it was a subtle hint? I almost deleted my blog out of spite.